The Hidden Truth of Leadership
Have you ever felt that exhilarating moment of stepping into a new leadership role, only to be swept away by an avalanche of unexpected challenges?
I’ll never forget that day. As I stepped into my new office, the polished wooden desk stood ready, while the large, picturesque window ahead reflected the smile on my face. It felt like the start of something special—a fresh opportunity to make a meaningful impact in work I was deeply passionate about. My heart raced with excitement and hope for the possibilities ahead.
However, as the days passed, that initial excitement began to fade. Soon, the doorway to my office transformed into a gateway for relentless challenges. Problems poured in, one after another, casting a shadow over what once felt like a bright beginning. The weight of others’ fears and concerns settled heavily on my shoulders, yet I tried to hold onto hope.
Then, one quiet afternoon, I closed my office door, slumped in my chair, and let my head rest on that big, shiny desk. Doubt crept in, faster than the tears that followed, as I whispered, “What have I signed up for? I don’t know if I can do this.” I had expected challenges, but I didn’t realize leadership would feel so heavy with the weight of decision-making and the responsibility of guiding others. In that moment, I recognized that leadership wasn’t just about the role—it was a mirror, reflecting my deepest fears, vulnerabilities, and unhealed wounds.
I could either look away and try to control everything around me or lean in and get curious about what was right in front of me. Much later, I came across the words of Warren Bennis, who said,
“Becoming a leader is synonymous with becoming yourself. It is precisely that simple and it is also that difficult.”
Those words resonated with me. I realized that to truly 'become myself' as a leader, I had to face those uncomfortable truths. This journey would require me to cultivate both curiosity and courage to explore the unknown and embrace what I might discover.
Navigating the journey of leadership and self-discovery can feel challenging and uncomfortable at times. So, how can we embrace this path while nurturing both curiosity and courage along the way? Here are some practical tips to support and guide you:
Prioritize Time for Reflection
In our busy lives, finding time for reflection can be challenging but invaluable. Set aside moments to pause and allow for intentional reflection to explore your experiences and emotions, fostering self-awareness. Whether through journaling or assessments, this practice helps you understand your motivations and values, bringing you closer to your authentic self.
Stay Curious
Curiosity invites us to explore rather than judge, opening doors to new perspectives. Often, we jump to conclusions or assume we have all the information we need, when in reality, our understanding is limited. Instead, ask yourself, What might I be missing? What story am I telling myself? What’s another way to view this challenge? By approaching situations with curiosity, we foster greater awareness and insight, creating an environment where learning and growth can thrive.
Embrace a Growth Mindset
Leadership is a journey, not a destination. Viewing challenges, obstacles, and mistakes as opportunities for learning allows us to grow. Each difficulty becomes a stepping stone toward enhanced skills, confidence, and resilience. Remember, every great leader has faced adversity; it’s our response that shapes our journey.
Be Kind to Yourself
In the pursuit of being a “good” leader, we often become our own worst critics. Remember that this journey is about practice, not perfection. Embracing self-compassion lets us treat ourselves with kindness, creating space for growth and learning. This compassionate approach nurtures a healthier relationship with ourselves, essential for becoming our true selves.
Ask for Help & Bring Others Along
Leadership can feel isolating, but it doesn’t have to be. Lean on supportive friends, peers, mentors, or coaches for perspective and encouragement. Asking for help is a sign of strength that fosters connection and supports well-being, vital to growth and development.
No matter where you are on your leadership journey, remember this—it’s not just about becoming a leader, it’s about becoming YOU.